Stress and Student Leaders

Any professional in Student Affairs is familiar with the ever-increasing levels of stress students are facing. This stress is usually even higher among student leaders. As a result, some student leaders make poor decisions in handling that stress, sometimes resulting in underage alcohol use, a visit to the Office of Student Conduct, and the possibility of losing their leadership positions. I worked with a student leader recently - we’ll call her Nora - who drank so excessively that it resulted in her transportation to the hospital. Leading up to the incident, Nora had not exhibited any signs of being too overwhelmed. I consistently do check-ins with my students and each time, she said she was doing well. The incident however proved otherwise.

I saw this as a developmental opportunity for her, and one for me, as I needed to utilize my knowledge and trainings to shape my approach to addressing the situation. What do I do when a student leader gets into trouble? How can I support him or her while also making sure to address the issue in an educational manner? With Nora, her case went through the student conduct process as per my institution’s procedure. This left me with more of an opportunity to connect with her about what was really happening in her life. In our conversation, I used a student-first approach, trying to identify her immediate needs. When asked what happened that night that prompted her to act so out of character, she responded by explaining she was stressed and anxious about the many projects and involvements she was balancing, especially in the face of midterms. In this conversation, I remembered a recent counseling skills training I had attended a week prior. I remembered to actively listen, to ensure my body language was welcoming (no crossed arms!), and to look for the reasons behind the faulty actions. In our conversation I heard her need for support and presented our Center for Health and Wellness Promotion (CHWP) and the Counseling Center as possible options. I was surprised at her immediate openness to the idea. We scheduled an appointment for her that day so she could meet with a counselor.

I learned much from this incident with Nora. I aim to advise with love and care for my students, and I was disappointed that I had not been more in tune to the level of stress this student was experiencing. I saw that my students needed lessons around self-care and balancing work and a healthy lifestyle. I visited the CHWP the next day and asked for anything they had for tips and techniques for stress relief. I presented those tips to my student leaders at our next meeting, taking about fifteen minutes to review them and the importance of self-care. It is now a staple of our meeting to ask, “What did you do for yourself this week?”

While this incident was a challenging time for my student and for me as her advisor, it was also a learning experience that led to authentic conversation and better proactive measures. I learned the value of asking questions and looking for a response other than "I'm doing well, just busy." My hope is in the future I can better emphasize the importance of self-care with all my students and prevent dangerous situations like the one Nora experienced.


For some stress relief tips, please see:
http://www.sandiego.edu/chwp/documents/OvercomeStress.pdf
http://www.sandiego.edu/usdcc/relaxationexercises.php


If you have any tips of your own, please feel free to comment and add those! Thanks!!